You're Doing Better Than You Think

It’s time we name what so many families are living quietly behind closed doors: Our teens are in pain.

Our girls are silently suffering—turning their hurt inward, self-harming, anxious, overwhelmed, and battling depression. Our boys are struggling too—often acting out, misunderstood, labeled as “aggressive” or “defiant,” when in truth, they’re drowning in big emotions they’ve never been taught to hold.

And parents? They are exhausted. Scared. Carrying their own unhealed stories while desperately trying to support children who are getting worse, not better.

So many families come to me after they’ve “tried it all.” - Conventional evidence-based therapies. Multiple Diagnoses. Roulette of Medications. School interventions.
Still… nothing shifts.

Because what’s broken isn’t the child or the teenager.
What’s broken is the system. The way we see our children. The way we pathologize instead of listening and connecting. The way we separate instead of connect.

I believe this truth: We are more than a diagnosis. Our children are not just a checklist of symptoms, but whole human beings living in a disconnected world. Disconnected from parents and more and more connected with online friends, social media algorithms and video games that induce isolation and violence.

So healing doesn't begin with fixing the child. It begins with healing us. The parents. The nervous systems that hold the home. The environment where our children are trying to grow.

The invitation here is to shift the conversation.

Instead of asking, “What’s wrong with my child?”, let's start asking, “What has my child been trying to communicate through their behavior?”

Let’s move from managing symptoms to creating safety, relational safety. From reacting with fear to responding with curiosity and compassion. From fixing to connecting and creating a relationship first.

So what can parents do?

It all starts with us. always. And I created a short list of simple yet powerful shifts families can begin making today:

Regulate before you relate (or co-regulation): Children and teens borrow our nervous systems. If we want them to be calm, we have to be calm. Begin your own practice of nervous system care—breathing, walking, journaling, or simply pausing before reacting. Sit with the uncouncomfortable and get curious and compassionate towards yourself first.

Listen without fixing or shaming or punishing (active listening/reflective listening):
Teens don’t always want advice. Most of the time they just need to feel seen - like all of us, we do not want to feel alone with our pain. So try saying: “I’m here. That sounds hard. Tell me more.” - that creates a space for exploration.

Trade correction for connection: connect first!
When your child is dysregulated, prioritize connection, relational safety and compassion. Sit beside them with their feelings and offer a hand. Let your body say, “You’re not alone. I love you. I am here with you”.

Use creative expression as release
Art, music, movement—these are powerful, non-verbal ways for children and teens to process emotion and trauma without needing words.

Support the whole system
Seek support for you, not just your child. Parent coaching, mindfulness, trauma-informed spaces, or community circles can help you show up with strength and softness.

If you’ve tried everything and nothing has helped, please know this:
It’s not too late. You are not failing.You are just being called to take a different path.

A path of presence over pressure, healing over controlling.
A path of wholeness over perfection.

At Mindful Art Practices, I walk this path with you—through individualized support, creative healing, and trauma-aware guidance that sees your child and sees you.

Let’s rebuild connection from the inside out.